Walmart Has Hit a New Low

My opinion of Walmart has never been very high, but yesterday they hit a new low. Thankfully, I was out by myself with no deadlines to meet, so I could watch the whole thing unfold in a non-agitated state.
I had just finished piling my cart with a week's worth of groceries, baby stuff, and cleaning supplies (plus a couple other odds and ends) and had made my way to the checkout lanes when--lo and behold!--there were no checkout lights on! Not one! This was around 10pm. They did have the 20 items or less Express lanes open, but I didn't want to invite a case of "Check-out lane Rage". Not with my massively full and overflowing cart. Everybody there had 20 items or less--and there were a lot of customers.
I figured (I don't know why) that if I made my way over to a "regular" lane with a cashier standing nearby, they would then check me out. Y'know, take the hint. I noticed a cashier finishing up with a customer even though their light was out, so I made my way over.
I pulled up, and before I could begin to unload, she told me in no uncertain terms. "This lane is closed." So I nicely and politely (yes, I did, I was very nice and polite), said, "So are all the other lanes. Where should I go?" She looked a bit miffed at that and said, "Well go down to Lane 18 then, I'll be there shortly."
The thought crossed my mind, "If she's going to check me out, why can't she do it here instead of meeting me at Lane 18?" But I didn't say anything and I just followed her instructions.
Lane 18 had a mound of stuff on it with another cashier there in her Santa hat. She also pointed out the obvious. "This Lane is closed."
I repeated myself (still nicely and politely) "Yes. I know. So are all the other lanes. Another cashier said she'd come down here to check me out."
She said, "Oh." and fiddled with the stuff on the counter. The other cashier makes her way down to Lane 18. Unceremoniously she looks at me and says, "You're going to have to wait awhile." To which I replied (since my options were endless), "Then I guess I'll have to wait awhile." with a smile a little more forcedly plastered onto my face.
She and the Santa-capped cashier lady begin to talk about the mounds of stuff on the checkout belt.
Santa-capped cashier: "Well, I checked out all my stuff...and *mumble...mumble* wouldn't accept it, and I don't have *mumble..mumble* card with me..."
Other cashier: "So what are you going to do with it?"
Santa-capped cashier: *mumble...mumble*...waiting for someone to bring me a cart...*mumble...mumble*...

Meanwhile, I'm just standing there with my cart. There's no where to unload anyways with all her stuff piled on it. *FINALLY* some other cashier woman brings the cart. At this point I'm thinking it's the beginning of a good joke, "How many Walmart cashiers does it take to get one cart and load it?"
So slowly...so slowly...they begin loading the cart. It takes 2 of them while Santa-capped lady is *still* complaining to the third cashier on why her card didn't work. As they're almost done, the orginal cashier woman looks up, and down the line of checkout lights (since we're now at the last one), and says, "No lanes are open!"
BINGO!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! I told her twice. Clearly. I told two people the lanes were all closed! Did they think I was hanging about for fun??!!! I'm not sure what exactly they didn't understand when I told them all the lanes were closed!
So I said again (nicely--really--I have kids that = more patience), "Yes. That's why I'm standing here waiting to be checked out." Just in case they forgot why I was standing there. I wanted to be clear. They seemed to be having a hard time understanding things.
The original cashier lady said, "Well, the girls don't all get here until 10pm." And I'm thinking "?????????---so everyone leaves at exactly the same time and there's no one manning the stations at the top of the hour ??????" That can't be what she means. I look at my watch. 10:05 pm.
Finally, the cashier lady starts to check me out, at which point, another cashier lady comes up and checks in, and asks an amazingly insightful question, "Do you need me to work this lane over here?" To which one of the cashiers, replies, "Pick one! They're all closed!" Finally, things are clicking!

...and that was another night of shopping at Walmart...stay tuned for next weeks' Walmart gaffe...